Top 5 Things I’ve Said Today:

5. Must we speak in octaves capable of splitting my skull open?

4. Damn it, Mommies are allowed to!

3. Me: Let’s please cover all body parts between chests and thighs before exiting the front door. Jack: Cool that means we don’t have to where shoes!*

2. Jeff: She’s your daughter; I saw where she came from. Me: She’s your daughter, you put her there.

1. No Jeff, that’s not a euphemism, I’m really just craving chocolate chip cookies.

*I realize Jack actually got the punch line here, but hey it’s MY blog.

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